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Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Testing, Testing, 1 - 2 - 3....

And so it begins.  Again.  Not just talkin about stupid ass deep freeze wintery weather either.  Which we're havin...again....it's 18 degrees outside & looks like a blizzard! And I'm sick of it.  Enough already! GAWD!!!  No, what I'm mostly talkin about is the flurry of tests/labs/doctor's visits.  Seems like somethin's gonna be looked at/scanned/poked every couple of weeks from now through March.  Yay me! LOL! But a close watch on stuff is a good thing.  I know this.

Got my chest X-ray yesterday.  First one since all this bullshit started.  It went fast (surprisingly, since I was sent to the hospital to have it) & smooth enough. In & out in less than 30 minutes.  And at 4:00 too!  And that was great.  But now, the appointment with the Oncologist, Dr W looms.  Tomorrow.  Weather permitting.  I need it to permit.  So I can know.  Not just about the chest X-ray (pleasepleaseplease be normalnormalnormal), but also about the blood work.  Why now am I so all weirded out about the labs, since I've had beautiful labs for over a year now?  Well, up until recently, I really didn't know exactly what all this blood work tells a doc.  I didn't know that Dr W could possibly detect some cancers with it.  But now that I know this....yeah.  I think I'm one of those people for whom ignorance truly is bliss.  I usually stroll in there, usually go by myself.  All chatty with the staff & the nurse.  All grinnin like a goon (most times) when Dr W comes in.  But that's probably not gonna be the case this time.  Until he gives me the all clear on both tests.  Then cue the goon-ness. (What IS it with me & the cancer doctors? LOL!) But until he's given me a thumbs up, I'll be a bit of a bundle of nerves. And this will not be a surprise to him.

And lately I've just gotten so paranoid of stuff.  Like right before the bone scan....every little ache or pain...like the shoulder pain I'd been having.  Just KNEW the scan was gonna be not good.  But it turns out, I believe the shoulder pain was directly related to the port removal.  Anyway...yeah, every little issue or bodily function....& I'm all like..."uh oh...that's not normal....or is it?  Has that always been like that?" (TMI? Sorry...lol) I mean, paranoia will destroy ya...(Did I REALLY just say that stupid shit? *Sensing readers eyes rolling*) But I'm actually feelin much calmer since the X-ray is done.  Dunno why...not like I expected anyone to tell me any results.  Which they didn't.  Cause they can't.  And they were so rushed.  You could tell they were still digging out of a back log of patients that probably rescheduled during the 4 days of frozen tundra we had last week.

Anyway.  Yeah.  Another snow day at home.  Not supposed to get above freezing till Friday, but come close tomorrow.  Close enough to see Dr W?  I hope so.  And I don't.  But I do. I think.  Eh!  For now it's just me & hubby & our lovely space heater...hangin out.  Gettin caught up on things around the house.  And drippin faucets & all that lovely stuff.  

And I can see I haven't posted a hair regrowth after chemo picture in awhile, so I'll be doin another post later with some 14 month pics of the afro-mullet.  

And tomorrow I'll be back with what Dr W says, or if I got rescheduled.

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