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Thursday, August 29, 2013

Where Is The Life That I Recognize?

*Gone away.

Sometimes being self employed just isn't all it's cracked up to be.  At all.  Oh sure, when you're younger, just starting out, freshly sick of the Nine To Five rat race & now making more money AND you have your "freedom" too?  Oh yeah, it's great.  

But then something get older...tire more easily.  You look up & you find you've spent the last *insert number of years here* working pretty much 24/7 to meet deadlines & satisfy your now *insert number* of bosses clients who depend on you to save the day. And at the very last minute, too too many times.  So you toil along, 24/7...leaving no time for social or recreational activities.  Had much more of that when we worked at our old "Nine To Fives". But I won't cry for yesterday...  

And then the economy did it's fun little crash thing & small businesses suffered hard core. And don't even get me started on the taxes you have to pay.  Gone are the days of refunds. But I won't cry for yesterday...  

And all for what?  For the freedom to be your own boss?  Set your own hours?  Have time for work and play?

Yeah.  That hasn't been our experience much lately.

Oh & let's throw in the complete destruction of life & the future as we know it with our new "Ordinary World" of breast cancer concerns, doctors appointments, doctors bills, and the like...


Sorry that I appear to be in the midst of a complete (ongoing) pity party here.  Nothing like a last minute bomb getting dropped on you less than 19 hours from a deadline to give you such a warm fuzzy about owning your own business. Not. 

Obvs I'm still in the same mindset I was in when I posted "Life Is Very Short" . And I'm a big believer that you are shown signs, if you are open to seeing them.  The signs appear to be very clear.  And not just from a work & professional perspective either.   

And maybe all of this would be easier dealt with, if our world had never been turned upside down with cancer, forcing us to find the "new normal".  And everything happens for a reason... Is that what it had to take to get us to slow down & realize what's goin on & what's not goin on? What can we do to make it better? 

We're working on it.     

*But I won't cry for yesterday,
There's an Ordinary World, 
Somehow I have to find.
And as I try to make my way
To the Ordinary World
I will learn to survive.

* "Ordinary World" - Duran Duran

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