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Friday, June 24, 2016

It's Just A Jump To The Left....

Or a hop. A Time Hop.

Gonna ramble around a bit here....

My love / hate thing with Facebook and Social Media is ever evolving more toward the hate side of things.


One of the last times before I knew I had cancer
June 2009
My Time Hop App and the "Memories On Facebook" thing is becoming very difficult for me. Two terrible things are looming if I continue to open the App or look at Facebook...a cancer diagnosis, and the epic fail of an attempt to move to the east coast to improve our life.

I really don't have a whole lot to say on the subject, other than, it's very hard for me to be reminded, by seeing actual posts and comments from my Facebook, on how life was b.c. 
Before cancer. 
Even now at seven years out.

I keep thinking I'll turn the "Memories" thing off on Facebook. Can you even do that? (Ooooh, just learned it has filters that will filter out people or dates of your choosing!) And that I'll just delete Time Hop from my phone for a few months. But then I don't. I look. It's like, I have to. Like when people pass a bad car accident. You look to see what carnage is there, and then sometimes wish you could unsee what you just saw.

And I think I'm that way with these stupid apps. I have to try to remember the feelings. 

I don't know why. 

But then, I've kind of always been this way, even before technology took over our lives. I always have kept a pretty detailed wall calendar & will, from time to time, go back through them & just remember when.

I know why there wasn't anything in there from this day in 2009, that's for sure.

On this day in 2009 (June 24 at the time of my typing this), I was having an ultrasound of my breast and being told to come back tomorrow for a biopsy. 

And Time Hop or no, I will not, can not, forget it. It's stuck in my brain like it was yesterday. Why can't chemo brain lose that memory for me?

Anyway...just a rambling musing. 

Let's (not) do the Time Warp again!








10 comments:

Rebecca said...

It has happened to me too on facebook. I get reminded of things I don't want to remember. Things I wish I could forget about. I've often said that I wish chemo brain was selective. I've even written a list of those things (maybe I will share). My dx would be one of the things I would want to erase from my memory for sure! Sending you a big hug!

LunaTechChick said...

Thanks Rebecca! I did learn that you can make the Facebook Memories app filter out people & dates. And still, painful as it is, I can't bring myself to do it. WTF?!! Gawd!

Paula said...

Yeah, I get that feeling for sure. I am okay with most of my memories since it's been 26 years for me so luckily not much on Facebook about my BC days. But now I am hit with my Adam memories and sometimes it just breaks me up for hours. But as you say, I just can't filter him out. Not yet.

Kathi said...

It's weird, isn't it? I'm still not sure how I feel about seeing photos of my pets that have died either. Oy.

LunaTechChick said...

Awwwww Paula....I knew you'd totally understand. I know Facebook means well & all, but still.... I agree too....we can't & shouldn't filter things & those precious to us, here & not, out. Love you! xx

LunaTechChick said...

Hey Kathi....Yes, that. Exactly. And I'm hit with that too....Glad there is the filter for the Facebook Memories thing, though I haven't used it yet. And Time Hop, well, I could choose to just not open it. But I always open it. But then again, I've kind of always been this way, even before technology took over our lives. I always have kept a pretty detailed wall calendar & will, from time to time, go back through them & just remember when. xx

Cancer Curmudgeon said...

Hmmm, this is a weird thing. But I guess anything, not just social media, can do this. Like pictures of people or pets like Kathi says, or scrolling by a deceased friend or relative in contacts on my phone. Hmmmm.

LunaTechChick said...

Yeah, I agree. Just having a bit of a hard time lately... xx

Beth Gainer said...

Time Warps are great for positive things, but I totally get when something reminds you of a negative time of one's life. I'm sorry you've had such reminders of late. The perils of social media. Great post.

LunaTechChick said...

Hey Beth! Yeah...I think I will always have issues with July...and August....and September. Last hear I was distracted with moving....and now that's another thing in July that was sucky. Ah well....like I said, I've always been this way in regards to looking back....social media just makes it so much more in your face, doesn't it? Still, I'd rather have use of social media than not. Thanks for reading & stuff. xx